Old Disco drivers are murderers!

[JumboBeef]

All old Disco drivers are murderers, says Jeremy Clarkson  :lol:

The Discovery filled that hole nicely and, as a result, became very popular with murderers.

Occasionally the Disco was bought by a farmer’s wife but mostly it was bought by people who like complicated guns and camouflage trousers. These people label themselves “off-road enthusiasts” and “green-laners” but it’s all just a front for murdering.

Why does anyone need camouflage trousers? It’s because they want to hide from the police in the woods. And why do they have a Discovery? Because a Discovery can get very far into those woods, which means bodies can be buried in places where they won’t be found by pesky dog-walkers.

You may wonder why they chose a Discovery rather than, say, a Toyota Land Cruiser, but that’s because you’re not paying attention. Like murderers in hillbilly America, “off-road enthusiasts” are practical people who enjoy mending engines and gearboxes. A Land Cruiser never goes wrong and, as a result, provides no opportunity for tinkering.

And, again, like the American backwoodsman, the British rural murderer is a fiercely patriotic soul who shoots squirrels and badgers simply to prepare for the day when he is called upon to kill communists and immigrants. Furthermore, if he had a Toyota he wouldn’t be able to get as far into the woods, so his bodies would be discovered and there’d be much unpleasantness.

You think this is nonsense? Really? Well, next time you are in the British countryside, look carefully at the person driving along in an old Land Rover Discovery and ask yourself a simple question. Would you let him take your daughter for a picnic?

Gotta love JC  :lol:

[carbore]

Very good, mind you what happens if you combine a "truckist" and a Disco owner, im sure there are a few of those here!!!!!  (please note, this is a JOKE!)

[mike142sl]

Classic  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

[dxmedia]

Very good, mind you what happens if you combine a "truckist" and a Disco owner, im sure there are a few of those here!!!!!  (please note, this is a JOKE!)

You get a reliable disco?


>>>> runs for cover

[crazymac]

Speaking as a Discovery owning murderer................................


I love it, funny bloke :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Can I take anyones daughters for a picnic??? :dance: :dance:

[Disco Matt]

He's scared of Disco 1s, I remember his review of the D2 describing the previous model as a "point to point widowmaker"  :lol:

[wullie_r]

JC is a legend. 

Im a disco owner, cyclist, biker, got my HGV licence and Scottish.  Fit into every group he rips.  :dance:

[Saffy]

How many bodies can you get into the back of a disco anyway before having to bring out the saw? The defender you can get a small village worth in the back.

[dxmedia]

How many bodies can you get into the back of a disco anyway before having to bring out the saw? The defender you can get a small village worth in the back.

Wow, is this a 'new' imperial measurement? 

Oo  look at that lwb. it's 3 chains long, 19 hands high and 6 3/16th dead bodies big.

[Disco Matt]

Based on my experiences of trying to sleep in the back of my truck you would not get many in before they become noticeable from outside!  :lol:

Tip for those in Hotel Disco mode: Fold the passenger seat back and sleep on that. You will at least be in a vaguely straight line and won't end up with horrific neck or back ache!

[ben-dent]

gotta love JC he knows how to stir it dont he

like the quote :clap: :clap:

Furthermore, if he had a Toyota he wouldn’t be able to get as far into the woods, so his bodies would be discovered and there’d be much unpleasantness

the toyota guys wont like that  :dance:

[muddyjames]

JC is a legend. 

Im a disco owner, cyclist, biker, got my HGV licence and Scottish.  Fit into every group he rips.  :dance:

Ah, your missing the caravan bit which is where I fill in the gap! :lol: