Mud-club
Chat & Social => The Bar - General Chat => Topic started by: merlin617 on January 10, 2009, 16:05:13
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Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
What is the speed of darkness?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?
Are there specially reserved parking spaces for 'normal' people at the Special Olympics?
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Did you ever stop and wonder......
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze
These pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'
Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum.'
Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs !
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Stop singing and read on.......
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
Important questions :grin:
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:lol: :D :clap: :clap: :lol:
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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
Testing? :D
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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
Testing? :D
Good answer :clap:
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who decided that DYSLEXIA should be spelt like that?
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Thats not how you spell disslexyer!
Sorry, just couldn't resist that one :lol:
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Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
I know the answer to this one, it's a bit sad really.
the human brain is unable to fully comprehend the idea of billions of stars, without the ability to touch or count each individual one. So it reverts to a basic self defense mechanism and doesn't allow the mind to challenge the information. But as you can physical touch a painted item to prove the statement, the brains allows this data to be challenged. Which results in getting paint on your hands, face, clothes and many other places - even though you only used yuor finger tip to test.
It always amuses me when people touch a peice of metal they have just welded/grinded to see if it's hot, then seem really surprised when it burns there fingers!
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Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
I know the answer to this one, it's a bit sad really.
the human brain is unable to fully comprehend the idea of billions of stars, without the ability to touch or count each individual one. So it reverts to a basic self defense mechanism and doesn't allow the mind to challenge the information. But as you can physical touch a painted item to prove the statement, the brains allows this data to be challenged. Which results in getting paint on your hands, face, clothes and many other places - even though you only used yuor finger tip to test.
It always amuses me when people touch a peice of metal they have just welded/grinded to see if it's hot, then seem really surprised when it burns there fingers!
Thanks for that. Err I think :-k
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what the deffination of dna?
national dyslekic assation :D :D and I shuld no Im dyslexic
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Why do we say the alrm clock goes off, when quite clearly (and loudly) it comes on?
Is it coincidence or irony that the film 'Twister' sucked??
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I think we have too much time on our hands (but dont tell the wife lol)
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And the good old one.. if tyre's wear out on the road and the roads wear out where does all the rubber and tarmac go?? ;)
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hears a question, why do we ask some one in thedoctors if they are ok? shurly not or they or us would not be there
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hears a question, why do we ask some one in thedoctors if they are ok? shurly not or they or us would not be there
And when we asked if we are OK, we always answer 'fine', even if we have a stinking cold?
(Probably because we know the asker of the question doesn't *really* want to know the answer!)
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Why was Captain Birdseye's ship crewed entirely by children? :-k I find that worrying.
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Why was Captain Birdseye's ship crewed entirely by children? :-k I find that worrying.
Because they don't fall into the minimum wage rules :lol:
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How does the man who drives the snow plough get to work?
Why is there only one word for Theasaurus?
How do you grow a seedless grape?
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Why did none of the murderers knock off Jessica Fletcher on the Murder, She Wrote? As the rest of the law enforcement officers always seem to be inept at solving crime.
Also can a daysack be used at night?